This is how it looks to shape-up:
Army of the Twelve Monkeys vs. Pats 6:15 Gold
Warriors vs. Snipers 7:30 Gold
Brewzers vs. Spiders 7:45 Green
Diggers vs. Blue Devils 9:00 Green
Iceholes vs. Stickmen 10:15 Green
Komets vs. Puckers 10:30 Gold
As a bonus to the schedule, all of the games feature one winner and one loser from last week, giving everyone the opportunity to level the field. Of course that would be a boring prediction, and way too easy. So try this on for size.
FROM THE DESK OF... jo-jo
The Monkeys will be ready (even at 6:15!) this week, not just in the final period, but even before the puck drops. During warm-ups they look to score a couple from the opposite end on a daydreaming Ellis, and will keep throwing them at him for the duration. The Pats are not clicking on offense just yet but, will give-up very little ice to the "rookie" team. Can the ATM Goalie Phil the net against his former team? With all of those shoot-arounds they might know all of his weaknesses...
sorry Pats, ATM wins this one, 3 to 2
The Warriors will be Snipe hunting and with this line-up how can they come away without bagging the limit? The intrepid Snipers will throw all they have at this machine but if they don't get a big performance from every one of their players they just won't stand a chance. I think big Joe will shine in this...
second Sniper loss, Warriors on top, 4 to 2
The beautiful Brewzers look to take revenge for the opening loss on the sputtering offense of the Spiders. Well, the scores may be few and far between this session for these Spiders but they may only need one with The Roach in net. Mike will have to look one more week to surpass his OT mistake as...
The Spiders win, 1 to _ (to say it is to jinx it)
Blue Devils are feeling the confidence returning to the once proud franchise. The Grave Diggers were all set to suffer a terrible session but had a strong start last week. So the stage is set for two optimistic, gutty teams to tear each other up. The power plays will be on display and the kill will come up short for...
The Blue Devils, The Grave Diggers win, 5 to 3
The Stickmen line-up to be counted with the few, the undefeated (so half the league is undefeated at this point, it still counts). The Iceholes will be leaning heavily on there defense, but you have to score to win. The consistent Blubaugh will be on fire turning away 30 shots, and earning 4 minutes of penalties. This one will go all night with seven shooters needed to decide the game. But the streak will end for the Sticks...
The Iceholes win, 2 to 1 OT, shoot-out!
Komets and Puckers, I stand by my post: This will be a brawl. The Puckers are going to the darkside. When the Komets show up, they will be looking to cruise to another victory, and this halfhearted attempt will find them trailing by two goals at the end of the first. The Puckers will start off the second demonstarting there physical game, allowing 6+ minutes of Komet power play and allowing the Komets to come within one. The third will find both of these parties at their very best, and everyone will no doubt be glued to the glass in the crossbar. I can see in my crystal ball, the face of Ryan Smith frozen in a terrific scream but the score, I can't be sure, the ghost of Casey J clouds my vision, The winner?
I cannot reveal the winner, but here's the score: 6 to 3, to be decided inthe final three minutes. It will be GLORIOUS!
Okay, you heard it here. I'm sure the lines in Vegas are jumping all over the place now.
Go get 'em tigers.
bcIII
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
It's in the Books, Weak One
Another session underway and if your not enjoying it then maybe you should retire. Outstanding play all around some surprises, some disappointments. This is how I saw it.
This week's players:
Jamil Jabri 2 goals
Wil Dobson 2 goals (for 2 teams)
Dustin Nation 2 goals
Honorable mention to Travis Lehr
Goalie of the week:
Nina Bonifaz Shut-out on 27 shots
ATM 4
Grave Diggers 0
The evening got started with the debut of the Army of the Twelve Monkeys who looked very underwhelming throughout 32 minutes of play managing only one goal against the humble Grave Diggers, then all hell broke loose. In the final minute of play the monkeys went crazy for three more goals, one just before the final buzzer as Ellis (out of the net again) loses possession of the puck and Stephen Culps slips it in, uncontested. the other goals go to the Lehr boys and hockey newby, Wil Dobson. If this team wants to live-up to the hype they had better get their game together.
Warriors 4
Patriots 2
Returning champs the Warriors in the rematch against the Patriots. A contest ripe with drama and for the first two periods, a low scoring affair. In the third the Warriors begin to assert themselves. Geoffrey Goodson makes good on a breakaway and Eric Johnson makes it three nothing on the powerplay. The Patriots then turn the tables scoring two quick goals including a sweet deke on the Bryan Brookman breakaway. But Travis Lehr allays all the Warriors fears with the final score of the game (his second of the night). The Patriots will have no rest next week either as they face the Warriors again next week, er, um, I mean the Army of the Twelve Monkeys.
Blue Devils 3 OT
Brewzers 2
Jeron Gibson starts the scoring with an assist from Gloria Buell for the Blue Devils. Then Jamil Jabri puts the Brewzers on his back with a return volley just 24 seconds later. Buell ups the Blue Devils total with a goal of her own in the second, and Jabri answers once more to send it to overtime. Just short of halfway through the extra period, a communication meltdown of the highest order sees, otherwise blameless, goalie Mike Moore step out of his comfort zone to whip a pass up the boards. The pass becomes a turnover and then Danny Flynn makes him pay for leaving the net open. Hey Mike, it's only a game, I feel your pain.
Komets 3
Snipers 2
Wil Dobson makes it on the scoresheet again (how can this guy call himself a newby?) with the opening goal. Dustin Nation scores two more in the second at which time the Komets lean back on their heels. Now, somehow, goalie Nicolas Murphee scores with an assist to absentee Jen Leonard. Then Eysermans puts in another one... but Murphee's valiant .940 save percentage is all for naught. Two periods of play proves to be enough for the Komets to hold on for the win.
Stickmen 2 OT
Puckers 1
The Puckers reportedly have my prediction on their bulletin board. Ginger Parker has taken it personally and is looking to make a mockery of my fine investigative journalism. And in the first period she takes her first step down that path, drawing all the defense away she sends the assist to Steve Niekamp for the only goal they would score. Superior goaltending was on display in this game. Blubaugh makes twenty saves, allowing only that one Pucker goal. While Pucker netminder Patrick Donaghue stumps all of the Sticks, except one. Jeff Thomas finally finds a hole in the third to send it to overtime, where he does it again. Ginger may have me in her crosshairs but the focus should be on the underachieving Komets. Next week promises to be a brawl.
Spiders 1
Iceholes 0
This was amazing. The return of giant goaler Jayson Jones. The arrival of the pint sized Nina Bonifaz. With a total of 49 shots only one goal, someone had to blink. Sorry Mr. Jones. I told you to beware of the Roach, did you listen? Nina constipates the Iceholes offense stopping all 27 of the shots thrown her way. Pete Clarke gets the game winner in the second.
Thanks to Brian for the dolphin story, unfortunately I will not be relating it here. See you next week in the crossbar.
bcIII
This week's players:
Jamil Jabri 2 goals
Wil Dobson 2 goals (for 2 teams)
Dustin Nation 2 goals
Honorable mention to Travis Lehr
Goalie of the week:
Nina Bonifaz Shut-out on 27 shots
ATM 4
Grave Diggers 0
The evening got started with the debut of the Army of the Twelve Monkeys who looked very underwhelming throughout 32 minutes of play managing only one goal against the humble Grave Diggers, then all hell broke loose. In the final minute of play the monkeys went crazy for three more goals, one just before the final buzzer as Ellis (out of the net again) loses possession of the puck and Stephen Culps slips it in, uncontested. the other goals go to the Lehr boys and hockey newby, Wil Dobson. If this team wants to live-up to the hype they had better get their game together.
Warriors 4
Patriots 2
Returning champs the Warriors in the rematch against the Patriots. A contest ripe with drama and for the first two periods, a low scoring affair. In the third the Warriors begin to assert themselves. Geoffrey Goodson makes good on a breakaway and Eric Johnson makes it three nothing on the powerplay. The Patriots then turn the tables scoring two quick goals including a sweet deke on the Bryan Brookman breakaway. But Travis Lehr allays all the Warriors fears with the final score of the game (his second of the night). The Patriots will have no rest next week either as they face the Warriors again next week, er, um, I mean the Army of the Twelve Monkeys.
Blue Devils 3 OT
Brewzers 2
Jeron Gibson starts the scoring with an assist from Gloria Buell for the Blue Devils. Then Jamil Jabri puts the Brewzers on his back with a return volley just 24 seconds later. Buell ups the Blue Devils total with a goal of her own in the second, and Jabri answers once more to send it to overtime. Just short of halfway through the extra period, a communication meltdown of the highest order sees, otherwise blameless, goalie Mike Moore step out of his comfort zone to whip a pass up the boards. The pass becomes a turnover and then Danny Flynn makes him pay for leaving the net open. Hey Mike, it's only a game, I feel your pain.
Komets 3
Snipers 2
Wil Dobson makes it on the scoresheet again (how can this guy call himself a newby?) with the opening goal. Dustin Nation scores two more in the second at which time the Komets lean back on their heels. Now, somehow, goalie Nicolas Murphee scores with an assist to absentee Jen Leonard. Then Eysermans puts in another one... but Murphee's valiant .940 save percentage is all for naught. Two periods of play proves to be enough for the Komets to hold on for the win.
Stickmen 2 OT
Puckers 1
The Puckers reportedly have my prediction on their bulletin board. Ginger Parker has taken it personally and is looking to make a mockery of my fine investigative journalism. And in the first period she takes her first step down that path, drawing all the defense away she sends the assist to Steve Niekamp for the only goal they would score. Superior goaltending was on display in this game. Blubaugh makes twenty saves, allowing only that one Pucker goal. While Pucker netminder Patrick Donaghue stumps all of the Sticks, except one. Jeff Thomas finally finds a hole in the third to send it to overtime, where he does it again. Ginger may have me in her crosshairs but the focus should be on the underachieving Komets. Next week promises to be a brawl.
Spiders 1
Iceholes 0
This was amazing. The return of giant goaler Jayson Jones. The arrival of the pint sized Nina Bonifaz. With a total of 49 shots only one goal, someone had to blink. Sorry Mr. Jones. I told you to beware of the Roach, did you listen? Nina constipates the Iceholes offense stopping all 27 of the shots thrown her way. Pete Clarke gets the game winner in the second.
Thanks to Brian for the dolphin story, unfortunately I will not be relating it here. See you next week in the crossbar.
bcIII
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Are Goalies Really Nuts?
People always ask me why I play net (some would say i play a little more than just the net). I never understood why anyone would play anything else. I have a great view of the ice and you guys are killin' each other out there. It happens from time to time that a large body will fall on me and I have been given the nominal check into the boards but, for the most part, all I worry about is the puck. Since I have the best Kevlar and nylon and leather facade I can afford for that, no worries.
I have played "out" 1 1/2 times. Everything hurts after a game when you're out in the middle of that fracas. With humanity zipping all around me and lumber flying like an f5 tornado. And get this, as a regular player, you may go an entire game without even touching the puck! I know, it's shocking. Sure you guys have your rewards, goals, assists, plus/minus, or whatever... I just don't see how it's worth it. I need no more.
But nothing can beat the feeling of watching the play develop from the opposite end with great, defense breaking passes, and deft puck handling, culminating in an awesome shot... right into my glove, well any part of me actually. Or when everyone's heads are spinning and you singlehandedly stop the shot, the rebound, another rebound, and the next rebound until you finally calm it down with a whistle. I'm not saying it happens every time but when it does it more than makes up for the lower moments.
Alright, go ahead and bombard me on the comment board, ya' jerks.
For anyone who doesn't know it, the crossbar is a pretty copacetic place to be after a game. Lots of teammates, enemies, crazy girls (occasionally), and alcohol (some of it free*).
*the term free implies that no monetary exchange is made at the time of consumption but payment is often received with league fees, favors to friends, stupid dares, bodily harm, and excruciating hangovers.
P.S. I got this in the mail from McSweeney's:
This made me chuckle, but not quite enough to win me over completely, I'm afraid. Thanks for the look.
Best,Chris
On Wed , sent:
five most erotic fruits
dates
navel oranges
coconuts
prickly pears
passion fruit
five least erotic fruits
granny smith apples
blood oranges
figs
prunes
dingle berries
...sounds like a form letter rejection to me, ya' think?
bcIII
I have played "out" 1 1/2 times. Everything hurts after a game when you're out in the middle of that fracas. With humanity zipping all around me and lumber flying like an f5 tornado. And get this, as a regular player, you may go an entire game without even touching the puck! I know, it's shocking. Sure you guys have your rewards, goals, assists, plus/minus, or whatever... I just don't see how it's worth it. I need no more.
But nothing can beat the feeling of watching the play develop from the opposite end with great, defense breaking passes, and deft puck handling, culminating in an awesome shot... right into my glove, well any part of me actually. Or when everyone's heads are spinning and you singlehandedly stop the shot, the rebound, another rebound, and the next rebound until you finally calm it down with a whistle. I'm not saying it happens every time but when it does it more than makes up for the lower moments.
Alright, go ahead and bombard me on the comment board, ya' jerks.
For anyone who doesn't know it, the crossbar is a pretty copacetic place to be after a game. Lots of teammates, enemies, crazy girls (occasionally), and alcohol (some of it free*).
*the term free implies that no monetary exchange is made at the time of consumption but payment is often received with league fees, favors to friends, stupid dares, bodily harm, and excruciating hangovers.
P.S. I got this in the mail from McSweeney's:
This made me chuckle, but not quite enough to win me over completely, I'm afraid. Thanks for the look.
Best,Chris
On Wed , sent:
five most erotic fruits
dates
navel oranges
coconuts
prickly pears
passion fruit
five least erotic fruits
granny smith apples
blood oranges
figs
prunes
dingle berries
...sounds like a form letter rejection to me, ya' think?
bcIII
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Whither the Stars' 'Herd Upgrade'?
We now interrupt your I-league news for Stars talk ...
Still no idea what Razor meant when he said, very cryptically, on The Ticket last week that the Stars were about to "upgrade the herd." But the website www.rumormethis.com on Thursday cited a Florida newspaper as saying The Ambassador of Fun may be scouting the Lightning. Could it be there was something to the rumors about Martin St. Louis? Vaclav Prospal wouldn't be a bad addition, either, depending what we had to give up.
Here's what the blog reported:
Still no idea what Razor meant when he said, very cryptically, on The Ticket last week that the Stars were about to "upgrade the herd." But the website www.rumormethis.com on Thursday cited a Florida newspaper as saying The Ambassador of Fun may be scouting the Lightning. Could it be there was something to the rumors about Martin St. Louis? Vaclav Prospal wouldn't be a bad addition, either, depending what we had to give up.
Here's what the blog reported:
"Carter Gaddis and Erik Erlendsson of The Tampa Tribune report that Dallas Stars and the Chicago Blackhawks have been scouting the Tampa Bay Lightning recently.
Stars co-GM Brett Hull and director of player personnel Dave Taylor attended Tuesday’s Lightning home game versus the Edmonton Oilers, though it is unclear which team they were there to scout.
A few months, talk was that the Stars and Lightning were discussing a Martin St. Louis for Marty Turco swap. However, Erlendsson speculates that the Stars might be looking at forwards Vaclav Prospal, Chris Gratton, and Andreas Karlsson.
Erlendsson also reported that while the Stars were scouting the Lightning, there were no Lightning scouts in attendance at Tuesday’s game in Dallas.
Blackhawks scout Marc Bergevin also took in the game, and according to both Gaddis and Erlendsson, he was at the game to keep a close eye on the Lightning.
Blackhawks assistant GM Rick Dudley and “at least one other Blackhawks scout or executive” were also present at the Lightning’s previous home game. Word is that Chicago is interested in forward Prospal, and are believed to be shopping forward Tuomo Ruutu."
Saturday, January 19, 2008
predictions?
Yes! The schedule is finally out (http://www.pointstreak.com/players/players-division-schedule.html?divisionid=17603) and the excitement is building.
Twelve hungry teams will enter the rink to fight it out (or hug it out) over a nine game session. Most of them are the regular names we have seen for several sessions now, some with new rosters. Of course the new team: Army of the Twelve Monkeys looks to make a corpulent impression on our little league, their first practice is tonight. I thought, as your humble blogger, that I might give you my take on each of these teams in their current incarnations.
W L OL
The Grave Diggers- 3 6
The surprise sophomore team will stumble a bit this season. Sirkus (the senior) has assembled a new look team and the cadets will struggle with deciding weather gravedigger is one word or two. Watch out for last session's "most improved" Grave Digger, she is anxious to move to MVP status.
The Brewzers- 4 3 2
The best looking team in the league will scrape together a respectable season with their all but immutable cast. For some reason these guys have trouble making their games. If they can restore their passion for the game, this could be one of the elite teams...
The Blue Devils- 4 4 1
The venerable devils will not taste the ambrosia of I-league supremacy. Uninspired offense, chaotic defense, if any team could use a new look it's this squad (Drago, I'm looking at you).
The Warriors- 6 2 1
The returning champions will have the bull's eye on their back, but few will hit the mark. Without the stifling coaching of Dallas Lehr this team should be consistently performing at their keg game level. GET YOUR POPCORN READY!
The Patriots- 5 3 1
Les York has seen the writing on the wall and with several key trades and acquisitions looks to gain the dominance he lost in the last game he played... But it will take more than nine games to restore this franchise.
The Komets- 4 3 2
Prove me wrong mighty Komets. I just don't think you're ready. This team needs more than a super girl, they need a super man (I can feel your anger, use it, use your anger, Mel, strike me down).
The Snipers- 3 5 1
Another oldie but goody team, maybe too old, a team plagued with multi-team players, they never seem to have the stamina for three periods of demanding I-league hockey and without an IV of fresh bodies I don't see this team making it out of the basement.
The Ice Holes- 7 0 2
The stingy Ice Holes won't be allowing many goals this session either, handing out virtually all of the overtime losses to the league. Can Doug Taylor's decrepit body handle all of those extra minutes? They will lose their playoff game(s).
The Spiders- 4 3 2
The word on the street is that a little known goal tending commodity will be in the Spider stable and I ,for one, hope this is true. The Roach's diminutive frame houses a great talent. If the remainder of the team can score the timely goal this posse will easily surpass my predicted record.
The Puckers- 1 7 1
The lowly Puckers. Could a more terrible record happen to such a distinguished troupe? The giant killers are unable to string together two wins this season, but who will fall victim to these lovable losers this session?
The Stickmen- 4 2 2
Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. The Stickmen need a striker. Perennial all star goalie Blubaugh (coming off of injury) must feel like Hasek, when he played for Buffalo. I don't imagine that the Sticks will turn into the Redwings in the next couple of months. Keep your stick on the ice, pal.
The Army of the Twelve Monkeys- 8 wins, 0 losses, 1 overtime loss (but who to?)
I never saw this movie but I think it has quite a bit to do with mental illness, what better source to draw on for a hockey team, right? From what my sources tell me this team will be stomping its skate right down on the throat of this league. To be a freshman team in Euless doesn't always mean a struggle, many ringer squads have shown-up and knocked the rest of us in the face but this one looks to take it to a new level. The fee for using this ATM may mean losing by 3-5 goals. Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, after all, as a great man once said,"There's no right, there's no wrong, there's only popular opinion."
Well, I'm pooped. Good luck to those at practice tonight. See everyone starting on the twenty sixth.
In parting here is my word of the week (the word week is used loosely)
CLOYING adj. causing or tending to cause disgust or aversion through excess, especially with food or pleasure. Daniel Grimes felt the cloying sweetness of his keg winning hangover upon waking to the cold splash of his lawn sprinkler.
bcIII
Twelve hungry teams will enter the rink to fight it out (or hug it out) over a nine game session. Most of them are the regular names we have seen for several sessions now, some with new rosters. Of course the new team: Army of the Twelve Monkeys looks to make a corpulent impression on our little league, their first practice is tonight. I thought, as your humble blogger, that I might give you my take on each of these teams in their current incarnations.
W L OL
The Grave Diggers- 3 6
The surprise sophomore team will stumble a bit this season. Sirkus (the senior) has assembled a new look team and the cadets will struggle with deciding weather gravedigger is one word or two. Watch out for last session's "most improved" Grave Digger, she is anxious to move to MVP status.
The Brewzers- 4 3 2
The best looking team in the league will scrape together a respectable season with their all but immutable cast. For some reason these guys have trouble making their games. If they can restore their passion for the game, this could be one of the elite teams...
The Blue Devils- 4 4 1
The venerable devils will not taste the ambrosia of I-league supremacy. Uninspired offense, chaotic defense, if any team could use a new look it's this squad (Drago, I'm looking at you).
The Warriors- 6 2 1
The returning champions will have the bull's eye on their back, but few will hit the mark. Without the stifling coaching of Dallas Lehr this team should be consistently performing at their keg game level. GET YOUR POPCORN READY!
The Patriots- 5 3 1
Les York has seen the writing on the wall and with several key trades and acquisitions looks to gain the dominance he lost in the last game he played... But it will take more than nine games to restore this franchise.
The Komets- 4 3 2
Prove me wrong mighty Komets. I just don't think you're ready. This team needs more than a super girl, they need a super man (I can feel your anger, use it, use your anger, Mel, strike me down).
The Snipers- 3 5 1
Another oldie but goody team, maybe too old, a team plagued with multi-team players, they never seem to have the stamina for three periods of demanding I-league hockey and without an IV of fresh bodies I don't see this team making it out of the basement.
The Ice Holes- 7 0 2
The stingy Ice Holes won't be allowing many goals this session either, handing out virtually all of the overtime losses to the league. Can Doug Taylor's decrepit body handle all of those extra minutes? They will lose their playoff game(s).
The Spiders- 4 3 2
The word on the street is that a little known goal tending commodity will be in the Spider stable and I ,for one, hope this is true. The Roach's diminutive frame houses a great talent. If the remainder of the team can score the timely goal this posse will easily surpass my predicted record.
The Puckers- 1 7 1
The lowly Puckers. Could a more terrible record happen to such a distinguished troupe? The giant killers are unable to string together two wins this season, but who will fall victim to these lovable losers this session?
The Stickmen- 4 2 2
Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. The Stickmen need a striker. Perennial all star goalie Blubaugh (coming off of injury) must feel like Hasek, when he played for Buffalo. I don't imagine that the Sticks will turn into the Redwings in the next couple of months. Keep your stick on the ice, pal.
The Army of the Twelve Monkeys- 8 wins, 0 losses, 1 overtime loss (but who to?)
I never saw this movie but I think it has quite a bit to do with mental illness, what better source to draw on for a hockey team, right? From what my sources tell me this team will be stomping its skate right down on the throat of this league. To be a freshman team in Euless doesn't always mean a struggle, many ringer squads have shown-up and knocked the rest of us in the face but this one looks to take it to a new level. The fee for using this ATM may mean losing by 3-5 goals. Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, after all, as a great man once said,"There's no right, there's no wrong, there's only popular opinion."
Well, I'm pooped. Good luck to those at practice tonight. See everyone starting on the twenty sixth.
In parting here is my word of the week (the word week is used loosely)
CLOYING adj. causing or tending to cause disgust or aversion through excess, especially with food or pleasure. Daniel Grimes felt the cloying sweetness of his keg winning hangover upon waking to the cold splash of his lawn sprinkler.
bcIII
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