Is That Your Age or Your Skate Size?

In the crossbar the other night, acting the part of the social butterfly, I began to realize what a ridiculous thing we have going here. There was a highschool game in the midst of our little dress-up session, I was lucky enough to talk to one of the players in that game. His team had won against the team from Tulsa, one of the top rated teams in their league and as his season nears an end he has prospects for a career in juniors (this is professional hockey for young'uns) and who knows what beyond that. This kid is having fun, growing as a player, and accomplishing something. I am soon to be Thirty-two and clinging desperately to something I was never even close to having in the first place. Like many of you, I spend alot of money on this habit of mine and I can't even get that same fix that I used to, I just do it to feel normal.

When I grow-up I want to be... a grown-up. Admit it, you're a manchild too (or womanchild?), refusing to act your age and spend your Saturday night watching 48 Hours Mystery with the kids tucked in their beds. Instead you show up here for four or more hours playing a kid's game. We play at it like ten year olds, then move upstairs and act like we're 23, usually by Sunday mid-day we feel like we're 80. Some of us even take it to the extreme of tracking our stats and, get this, some of us write about it like it were some kind of legitimate sporting event. This is a sickness, and I don't want to get better.

I know that I am not alone, I am right in the middle of our demographic. This thing will be a draw on my life until I am the oldest one in the rink, when they carry me away. Many of you have been through marriages and careers with only this one constant in your life. I can't believe that they let a bunch of chronics like us hang-out together, we're just enabling eachother, right? What are the side effects? You know, I tell people it's my work out routine.

And it is, I do stay in pretty decent shape because of this hockey thing. And it does build a comradery, not just among those of us here on Saturday nights. You see many wives and girlfriends (and reverse the gender), and occasionally kids. I know that some of you have taken up coaching or skateguarding or some other method of sharing it with the people around us. Being a part of something like that, building relationships with people of all ages and backgrounds, could be a good thing. Then again it might be an epidemic.

bcIII

It's late and for some reason my spellcheck has been disabled, so deal with it!

This is it? Weak Too

And what a weekend it was. Underdogs were vindicated, amazing playmaking, new heroes were born, and dynasties were quashed... and we got to play some hockey on Saturday. The games were mostly exciting and certainly unpredictable (none of mine panned out). Let's see what happened.

My three stars:

Ryan (insert last name before posting) 2 goals, 2 assists

Eric Johnson 2 goals

Patty Greco 1 goal, 1 assist

Goalie of the week:

Patrick Donaghue .968 save percentage, 31 shots

ATM 2, Pats 1

Listen, do you hear? That is the sound of ultimate suffering. My heart made that sound when Ryan Smith buried the keg winner, Sabrina makes it now.

Before the game Dallas said he saw Ellis tapping the net with a chicken foot and muttering. The Monkeys just couldn't get a break, the puck just wouldn't go in. A.J. finally netted one in the second but the Patriots nuetralized it before the end of the period. The third was a deadlock, the tension building into a deluge of penalties. The resulting five on three Pat's powerplay was the turning of the game. On a cleared puck, Sean Griffin scores the shorty off of back checking Sabrina York's stick. The Patriots never recovered.

Warriors 5, Snipers 0

What a display of dominance. The Warriors are on a quest for perfection, looking to repeat, and running up the score on everyone in the way. Michaelides logs an unimpressive shutout, while Nick Murphee and the rest of the Snipe are assaulted in a Discovery Channel fashion. Two goals in the first, two more in the second (both to Eric Johnson), and one final score to rub the nose in it. Frank Casperson is the playmaker tonight as he dishes out three assists. The only catagorey the fiesty Snipers lead is penalties, you can't score from the box. This motley crew needs to do some serious soul searching (that is quite an alliteration!) before next week.

Spiders 2, Brewzers 1

On a night when Nina was dragging (cough medicine?), almost allowing a clearing attempt into the net she still manages to eek out a win. A very tight game until the third, when the almost forgotten Patty Greco makes her impression on Mike "Snakebit" Moore. She throws a shot into his stick and Lynn Kresta drives the rebound home, high, stickside. Then Patty, still hungry, takes advantage of the same hole herself, a shot that crawls right up his stick and over the blocker. I knew that the Spiders would win but I didn't see it this way. Great Caesar's Ghost, Mike, it's Patty Greco! The scorer for the Brewzers is Nadil "not Jamil" Jabri.

Blue Devils 5, Gravediggers 2

What the douche? The Diggers dig a hole starting with the first shot. Then Ryan (I can't remember your surname) scores two more, interupted by Sergio Castillo's goal. The second period saw the Diggers bring it within one but the momentum could not be wrestled back, and the Blue Devils make a mockery of the GD goalie (Jon Ellis, guess that chicken foot wore out) with two more tallies. That brings the grand total of 9 goals against for the Gravediggers in the first two games. Is there a league below I?

Stickmen 2, Iceholes 1

Blubaugh turns out another spectacular performance with a .960 save percentage. And the Sticks are putting in some timely goals. The Iceholes cannot expect to win many games scoring a goal every other week. It all started with missed defensive assignments allowing Stickman Brad "Spaz" Bynum to pop it in uncontested on Jayson Jones' back door. A hooking call by Stickmen bad girl Val Kuntz allows the Iceholes to even it up. Now pointstreak claims that Raul "bad" Galbreath netted this one but Blubaugh says it was on a screen and tipped by his own defense (I gotta agree with my fellow netminder since I can't remember the last time this guy scored). The game goes to the Sticks when Larry "Old Canuck" Wade picks up the savory rebound in the closing throws of the game.

Puckers 4, Komets 2

This game was not as exciting as I had hoped it would be. The Mother Puckers put out a fantastic scoring performance and are backed up by a monumental Donaghue, boasting a .968 on 31 shots. The Komets never even got close. The penalties were even tame, the two game suspension for Casey Jenkins was from a dispute over face-off etiquette between he and the linesman, I can't believe it, where has all of that Pucker attitude gone? I thought their would be bodies on the ice. No repeat scorers in the game and it looks like Ginger is on the scoresheet again this week, I can't say if she actually scored this goal or not but I am not going to dispute it, I would like to stay on her good side. The Komets faced a monster here but still have a lot more potential than they are exhibiting so far this session.

Put it behind you, two games, it means nothing. The prize comes to those who can make the long run, unless you lose it all in the playoffs. Whatever...

bcIII