The Ticket had a road show just a mile or so from the house, I made a sojourn.
The wife had to make it to her class which meant that I would have the kids in tow, but I was undeterred. And, to my relief, there was free popcorn and ice cream and plenty of room for milling about. I cruised past the broadcast table to the women's room and imposed a bathroom visit onto my daughter, surveying the room while I waited for her to re-emerge.
Golf was taking priority over the show, which was fine with me. Those in attendance were consumed in the tournament's goings on, leaving a birth around the two broadcasters, isolated despite the pumping of the monitors. I lugged my kids over to the promotions table, collected whatever I could find to interest them, and waited for the show to reach a stopping point. After consuming some popcorn and cleaning orange push-pop off of my daughter, it was my time to shine.
I approached the table, introduced myself to Corby, then Mike. I have gathered from years of listening that Mike is not the most accommodating of strangers, so I kept my engagement with him short, "I was hoping I could get Mike, here, to sign my Ursuline shirt."
"Sure" he responded
Corby chimed in, "Where did you get that?" Things were going very well.
"The McCart thrift store. I found it on the rack for 99 cents."
"What a deal" Mike says as he finishes his duty and strolls toward the bar.
I turn toward the Snake, busy feeding on beef tips, green beans, and mashed potatoes, and asked nervously, "Could I get you to do a quick interview for my blog? It's only 5 or 6 questions, not a big deal . . ."
He continued chewing but waved me on. Yes!
"Who is funnier: Myrtle the phone operator, Ezekiel of 7th heaven, or Greg Williams?"
"Greg Williams" no hesitation.
"When was the last time you played hockey?" I sputtered.
A stare.
A panic. "It's a hockey blog", I explain.
"Charity Challenge . . . '06?" he tries to recall, "I really liked it, I'm not done for good." Amazing, he is trying to play to me.
I grabbed a pointed stick, I had him where I wanted him, "Why do you hate Lynn Kawano?"
"Lynn Kawano?"
"She's a reporter, for Fox Four."
"I don't. Why would I hate Lynn Kawano?" What a terrible cover, denial. I think we all deserve a little more respect, especially Lynn. But I let it lie.
"Which event has had a more profound affect on your life: the birth of your son," I paused, "or the death of Payne Stewart?"
I had touched a nerve. He shook his head, the weight of which fell into his sweating hands, he knew he would be on the record, "The birth of my son, but Payne Stewart is a close second."
Now I had him on the ropes, let's see how he get's out of this one. "When did you graduate from O U?"
He waited, "I didn't, no wait, 1975. Just after their second national championship." Yeah, right. Just wait until I get home and do some fact checking. There is no way this guy is 55.
Then I went for an editorial, "The repealing of the Ipod ban at Whiterock. Corby, your take?"
The poor guy was reeling from the string of fastballs firing at his head, "Bulls***!", he exclaimed (thus I used an exclamation point). Now I was staring. There before me, he sat with his Ipod within his reach, I didn't understand.
"No, they REPEALED the ban on Ipods."
He was now on the same page, "Oh, they did? Well that's great", Corby was about to reverse the whip, " because I hate running with people, and talking with people, and being around people . . . "
My heart sank. I picked up my crip sheet and turned from the table, slowly walking away. Then I heard the cackle. Ah! You got me, Snake! A few more pleasantries and a handshake and it was over.
Thank you, superbowl.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Reign of censorship ends
Please behave accordingly. We're not prudes, but we'd rather not have slander or smut interfere with good, clean, American trashtalk.
Let the trashtalk fly, and don't forget to have some fun.
Go Blue Devils.
BC
Let the trashtalk fly, and don't forget to have some fun.
Go Blue Devils.BC
Sunday, June 22, 2008
And So It Begins. . .
The keg match-up is set: Blue Devils vs. Iceholes. These two teams should make a great game. The Blue Devils relentless and creative forwards against the stifling Icehole defense, and the patient Icehole shooters against the reflex goaltending of David Blubaugh.
Plenty of excitement on the horizon even if you (like me) are not among the lucky few playing in the big game. If you still can't get past the feeling that your next game is a pointless dress rehearsal for next session, then don't. Next session is after all right around the corner and face it, you aren't going to any of the practices so make the most of it.
Look for a drop-off in production from Alex Eysermans as he looks to tie the knot this coming Saturday. If she has already set the date for keg night surely his days of playing hockey at all are numbered. Maybe Blubaugh and Val will get married soon and I won't have to put up with his trash talk anymore. . . a pleasant thought.
Which leads me to another thought, the league is sixteen teams strong, but with only fourteen goalies logging more than four games for this session it would appear that now is the time to fulfill that fantasy of yours, you know you've thought about it. So if you've got an extra couple of grand lying around go get yourself some equipment. I've got an old set of leg pads (32" Simmons) if anyone is interested.
Here's the weekend that was,
Brewzers(6-3-0) 2, DFW Titans(4-4-1) 1
The Brewzers are the pick to make a splash for next session and they get started with this white knuckle test of will. With the Titan's goalie calling in ten minutes before game time a quick series of phone calls yielded only one result, yours truly, and five minutes late too. Rob Walker of the Brewzers throws a shot in on the empty net for the early lead, this would have to hold up for quite a while (I'm sure many of the Brewzers were wishing that they had taken a few more shots at that empty net). Throughout the second period, the Brewzers dominated play in all areas but could not get an extra score. Finally the Titans pull together and tie the game at the onset of the third, with Justin Mason's goal five seconds after the Titan's come off of the penalty kill. As time winds down to the inevitable OT and shoot-out, Rob Walker takes the game onto his shoulders and scores again, no joy for the Titans.
Privateers(6-3-0) 1, Warriors(4-5-0) 0
Ryan Haley, no doubt feeling guilty for her part in the temporary break down of the blog, doesn't make this game. The Privateers show up with their swarming offense, regardless, and it's Jonathan Horton who gets the first goal of the game halfway through the first. Phil Talley and the Warriors hold fast stopping all other attempts from the 'Teers, but it's the Warriors who end up crying. Despite stopping 25 of 26 shots the Warrior squad is unable to score a single goal. They tell me that winning isn't the only thing, do you still believe that, Warriors?
Iceholes(6-2-1) 5, Patriots(7-2-0) 1
It looked like a good game on paper. The Holes opened the scoring with a quick feed from behind the net to David Base, who shoves it point blank into Ellis' five hole. The Pat's answer in the fashion that was expected with a well engineered pass to William Craft catching Jayson Jones completely unaware, it would be the last time he would be in the position. At the closing of the first period, the Holes generate one more offensive rush and as the final second ticked away Chris Pringle's shot hit Ellis in the mask and banked into the net, this would prove to be the game winner. In the second Base scores again in similar fashion and despite their efforts on the very aware Jayson Jones, the only result is another goal against as Pringle gets his second. As the third started the Pats were noticeably shaken, the Holes were impenetrable, and scoring with incredible efficiency. Gino Ropos completes the route with a highlight reel goal: Ellis dives out for the poke, as the surging Ropos negotiates a nudge of the puck toward the net, Ropos falls over top of Ellis as the puck slowly slides over the line out of the corner of Ellis' eye. Ellis proves again that he just can't win the big game. Good luck to the Iceholes.
Blue Devils(8-1-0) 3, Stickmen(5-3-1) 2
The pick of destiny? In the first, Kevin Cook, of the Sticks, makes the most of his man advantage and scores the frames only goal. But in the second the Stickmen's powerplay gives-up a shorty to Charlie Heine, who scores again before the end of the period to gain the lead for the Blue Devils. Past the halfway point of the third Heine completes the hat trick, and all of the scoring for the Devils. Alex Eyserman bids a fond farewell to the league with what would prove to be the last goal of the game. The Sticks can muster no more in the final three minutes, and with half of the team planning on being out for Alex' wedding, it is probably best that the Devils advance. David Blubaugh has his cake and eats it too (or some other, more relevant cliche) as he will be playing for the Devils next week in the keg game, despite losing to them this week, huh?
Silverwings(4-3-2) 5, Komets(4-5-0) 2
The second upset of the night as the .500 Komets fail to close out the haphazard Silverwings. Brian Brookman strikes first for the Wings and before the period ends Sergio Castillo adds another. In the final minute, Mike Gallagher nets a goal to keep the Komets in the game. In the second it's Brookman again followed by Corey Howard (also on tap for marriage) as they slowly rip out the hearts of their sister team. In the third Castillo gets his second of the night, leaving A. J. Benedetto to score a meaningless goal in the final minute of the game. The Phantoms need some stability on the defensive end of their roster, and in my experience, a bigger roster in general, maybe Brookman needs to sell some more Minis?
Spiders(4-4-1) 5, Puckers(4-5-0) 0
In another upset the Spiders administer a whoopin' on the Patrick Donaghue lead Puckers. Pointstreak does not have this game listed, so the details are going to be subject to my patchy memory (all of the games kinda run together). The first couple of goals in the first period bounce around like pinballs eventually befuddling Donaghue and putting them behind, and the Spiders were controlling both ends of the ice. With no end in sight Donaghue becomes the pinball wizard and puts up stop after stop, but when the best attempt the Puckers could create bounces off the post and into Spider possession. While confused Puckers stood with their hands in the air, the weight came crushing down, and like Ginger's ankle, Donaghue collapsed.
Sniper(4-5-0) 3, Moose(0-6-1) 1
Even against the Snipers, we all knew what the result would be. The Snipers score first off Ed Vogel's stick and eventually Rich Wojcio evens things up for the Moose on the power play. Vogel scores again in the second, then when Gabriel Rivera goes to the box, Jesse Henderson scores the power play goal to increase the lead. With Kevin Cook of the Snipers out of the game the third goes by without much incident, the only action being Rivera taking another penalty. As a true I-league team, the Moose definitely need to make the most of all of the ice time they can get, if they want to become a competitor in this. . . whatever league we have. Snipers, shoot it on the net . . . MORE! I'm looking at you Kendall.
Grave Diggers(3-5-1) 3, Chiefs(2-5-2) 2, OT
I didn't witness all of the games personally but this one was my personal favorite. In a bizarre melee in front of the Chief's net Ben Stillwagon pushes the puck into his own goal, Digger Ron Edwards gets the credit for the goal and back at the other end of the ice, Ellis gets the assist, much to the consternation of Bob Sirkus (as an aside, congratulations to Mr. Sirkus on his return to the ice after hernia surgery, he did get an assist in the Silverwings game). The Chiefs get it back before the period ends when Steve Selner gets a good deflection off of the Digger defenders, and ruins their power play with a shorty. The second period was all about Ben Stillwagon, turning away shots, defusing plays, and frustrating the Grave Diggers in any way he could, even shaking off a stinger of a shot right onto his unprotected hip (on a dazzling save, no less). Ben succumbs halfway through the third but the goal is waved-off, shortly there after Randy Chappel picks up a rebound and scores a goal after the whistle, but this one is declared a goal. Find Jimmy "Stone Cold" Welch raising quite a ruckus over this one, without the ability to shut his mouth he soon finds himself being escorted off the ice. A shame, really, as Bill Broad runs down to the other end and gets the goal to tie it up, again. Stillwagon responds to his teams efforts and continues his stand. When overtime commenced, all present were expecting to see five minutes of spectacular goaltending from Stillwagon, but the Chiefs have to settle for three, as Ben can only stop 37 of the 40 shots logged on the scoresheet.
See you all next week, this should be very entertaining, and free hot dogs to boot!
If you have a digital camera and someone to operate it, please feel free to send me any pictures of next weeks keg experience, if I get them early enough on Sunday, I can put them up on the blog.
Plenty of excitement on the horizon even if you (like me) are not among the lucky few playing in the big game. If you still can't get past the feeling that your next game is a pointless dress rehearsal for next session, then don't. Next session is after all right around the corner and face it, you aren't going to any of the practices so make the most of it.
Look for a drop-off in production from Alex Eysermans as he looks to tie the knot this coming Saturday. If she has already set the date for keg night surely his days of playing hockey at all are numbered. Maybe Blubaugh and Val will get married soon and I won't have to put up with his trash talk anymore. . . a pleasant thought.
Which leads me to another thought, the league is sixteen teams strong, but with only fourteen goalies logging more than four games for this session it would appear that now is the time to fulfill that fantasy of yours, you know you've thought about it. So if you've got an extra couple of grand lying around go get yourself some equipment. I've got an old set of leg pads (32" Simmons) if anyone is interested.
Here's the weekend that was,
Brewzers(6-3-0) 2, DFW Titans(4-4-1) 1
The Brewzers are the pick to make a splash for next session and they get started with this white knuckle test of will. With the Titan's goalie calling in ten minutes before game time a quick series of phone calls yielded only one result, yours truly, and five minutes late too. Rob Walker of the Brewzers throws a shot in on the empty net for the early lead, this would have to hold up for quite a while (I'm sure many of the Brewzers were wishing that they had taken a few more shots at that empty net). Throughout the second period, the Brewzers dominated play in all areas but could not get an extra score. Finally the Titans pull together and tie the game at the onset of the third, with Justin Mason's goal five seconds after the Titan's come off of the penalty kill. As time winds down to the inevitable OT and shoot-out, Rob Walker takes the game onto his shoulders and scores again, no joy for the Titans.
Privateers(6-3-0) 1, Warriors(4-5-0) 0
Ryan Haley, no doubt feeling guilty for her part in the temporary break down of the blog, doesn't make this game. The Privateers show up with their swarming offense, regardless, and it's Jonathan Horton who gets the first goal of the game halfway through the first. Phil Talley and the Warriors hold fast stopping all other attempts from the 'Teers, but it's the Warriors who end up crying. Despite stopping 25 of 26 shots the Warrior squad is unable to score a single goal. They tell me that winning isn't the only thing, do you still believe that, Warriors?
Iceholes(6-2-1) 5, Patriots(7-2-0) 1
It looked like a good game on paper. The Holes opened the scoring with a quick feed from behind the net to David Base, who shoves it point blank into Ellis' five hole. The Pat's answer in the fashion that was expected with a well engineered pass to William Craft catching Jayson Jones completely unaware, it would be the last time he would be in the position. At the closing of the first period, the Holes generate one more offensive rush and as the final second ticked away Chris Pringle's shot hit Ellis in the mask and banked into the net, this would prove to be the game winner. In the second Base scores again in similar fashion and despite their efforts on the very aware Jayson Jones, the only result is another goal against as Pringle gets his second. As the third started the Pats were noticeably shaken, the Holes were impenetrable, and scoring with incredible efficiency. Gino Ropos completes the route with a highlight reel goal: Ellis dives out for the poke, as the surging Ropos negotiates a nudge of the puck toward the net, Ropos falls over top of Ellis as the puck slowly slides over the line out of the corner of Ellis' eye. Ellis proves again that he just can't win the big game. Good luck to the Iceholes.
Blue Devils(8-1-0) 3, Stickmen(5-3-1) 2
The pick of destiny? In the first, Kevin Cook, of the Sticks, makes the most of his man advantage and scores the frames only goal. But in the second the Stickmen's powerplay gives-up a shorty to Charlie Heine, who scores again before the end of the period to gain the lead for the Blue Devils. Past the halfway point of the third Heine completes the hat trick, and all of the scoring for the Devils. Alex Eyserman bids a fond farewell to the league with what would prove to be the last goal of the game. The Sticks can muster no more in the final three minutes, and with half of the team planning on being out for Alex' wedding, it is probably best that the Devils advance. David Blubaugh has his cake and eats it too (or some other, more relevant cliche) as he will be playing for the Devils next week in the keg game, despite losing to them this week, huh?
Silverwings(4-3-2) 5, Komets(4-5-0) 2
The second upset of the night as the .500 Komets fail to close out the haphazard Silverwings. Brian Brookman strikes first for the Wings and before the period ends Sergio Castillo adds another. In the final minute, Mike Gallagher nets a goal to keep the Komets in the game. In the second it's Brookman again followed by Corey Howard (also on tap for marriage) as they slowly rip out the hearts of their sister team. In the third Castillo gets his second of the night, leaving A. J. Benedetto to score a meaningless goal in the final minute of the game. The Phantoms need some stability on the defensive end of their roster, and in my experience, a bigger roster in general, maybe Brookman needs to sell some more Minis?
Spiders(4-4-1) 5, Puckers(4-5-0) 0
In another upset the Spiders administer a whoopin' on the Patrick Donaghue lead Puckers. Pointstreak does not have this game listed, so the details are going to be subject to my patchy memory (all of the games kinda run together). The first couple of goals in the first period bounce around like pinballs eventually befuddling Donaghue and putting them behind, and the Spiders were controlling both ends of the ice. With no end in sight Donaghue becomes the pinball wizard and puts up stop after stop, but when the best attempt the Puckers could create bounces off the post and into Spider possession. While confused Puckers stood with their hands in the air, the weight came crushing down, and like Ginger's ankle, Donaghue collapsed.
Sniper(4-5-0) 3, Moose(0-6-1) 1
Even against the Snipers, we all knew what the result would be. The Snipers score first off Ed Vogel's stick and eventually Rich Wojcio evens things up for the Moose on the power play. Vogel scores again in the second, then when Gabriel Rivera goes to the box, Jesse Henderson scores the power play goal to increase the lead. With Kevin Cook of the Snipers out of the game the third goes by without much incident, the only action being Rivera taking another penalty. As a true I-league team, the Moose definitely need to make the most of all of the ice time they can get, if they want to become a competitor in this. . . whatever league we have. Snipers, shoot it on the net . . . MORE! I'm looking at you Kendall.
Grave Diggers(3-5-1) 3, Chiefs(2-5-2) 2, OT
I didn't witness all of the games personally but this one was my personal favorite. In a bizarre melee in front of the Chief's net Ben Stillwagon pushes the puck into his own goal, Digger Ron Edwards gets the credit for the goal and back at the other end of the ice, Ellis gets the assist, much to the consternation of Bob Sirkus (as an aside, congratulations to Mr. Sirkus on his return to the ice after hernia surgery, he did get an assist in the Silverwings game). The Chiefs get it back before the period ends when Steve Selner gets a good deflection off of the Digger defenders, and ruins their power play with a shorty. The second period was all about Ben Stillwagon, turning away shots, defusing plays, and frustrating the Grave Diggers in any way he could, even shaking off a stinger of a shot right onto his unprotected hip (on a dazzling save, no less). Ben succumbs halfway through the third but the goal is waved-off, shortly there after Randy Chappel picks up a rebound and scores a goal after the whistle, but this one is declared a goal. Find Jimmy "Stone Cold" Welch raising quite a ruckus over this one, without the ability to shut his mouth he soon finds himself being escorted off the ice. A shame, really, as Bill Broad runs down to the other end and gets the goal to tie it up, again. Stillwagon responds to his teams efforts and continues his stand. When overtime commenced, all present were expecting to see five minutes of spectacular goaltending from Stillwagon, but the Chiefs have to settle for three, as Ben can only stop 37 of the 40 shots logged on the scoresheet.
See you all next week, this should be very entertaining, and free hot dogs to boot!
If you have a digital camera and someone to operate it, please feel free to send me any pictures of next weeks keg experience, if I get them early enough on Sunday, I can put them up on the blog.
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